INTERCESSOR BURNOUT!
Yesterday was Intercession Day pour moi.
I'm very new to praying over people, being Ms Selfish and Scared New Christian. But I do know God is kicking my fat butt and saying "GO, OBEY!"
Before I embarked yesterday, I prayed very hard in the Spirit and felt Him strengthen me in the morning. In fact I was overflowing with JOY on the MRT. It's a great feeling!!! I was looking forward to meeting my pal Maire, who left for India on her very first mission trip last night.
INTERCESSION ONE: MAIRE
Maire is a bright bubbly lady who is single. She was sent by God to lead me back to Him during the worst years of my life -- my living angel! Her own walk with the Lord is a passionate, argument-filled one, and she does a lot of praying in the car while driving to work. So not surprising she has had a couple of Dings on her Mazda! : ) Maire has, as any Singaporean woman over the age of 25, her own set of idiosyncrasies, and one of them is not wanting to get out of her comfort zone (I am very familiar with this).
She initially wanted to go on this mission trip because the church leader she is assisting was going. She also likes him and I think he also likes her.
He gets very sick and has an operation (not dying kind but because he itchy backside doctor said he's not allowed to move for 3 weeks and hence cannot go India)
Maire panicks, because her name is already down for the mission trip, but she in the flesh really dowan to go without him.
She prays and tries to cut a deal with God (also very familiar territory) to say since her role is only assisting, she will go on another trip.
God sends her old pastor from her previous church to the same restaurant she is dining. He tells her "GO TO INDIA".
She calls me to tell me the saga, I feel the quickening of the Holy Spirit and tell her "GO TO INDIA"
God is going to move very mightily while she is there. She had a vision of masses of children without eyes or mouths. I believe she will go to give them eyes that will see that Jesus is Lord, and mouths that will confess it.
She bites the bullet, and signs up for India anyway.
Shortly, her leader's doctor says he can go to India also.
But the important part is that Maire decided to obey God, and fought not to be swayed by her feelings for her leader or by her own flesh which was screaming out "Healing And Deliverance?! I know NOTHING about it."
From her experience I learned a powerful lesson: sometimes God will want to pluck you our of your comfort zone COMPLETELY. I mean, rip that comfort zone like a plastic bag off you. You will feel naked and exposed and definitely powerless and wanting to run away. That's when you know God will move if you obey because you have crucified your flesh, you are nothing, He is everything. Only when there is nothing left of your own self, can God work mighty miracles.
We prayed and I was filled with a GREAT GREAT JUMPING UP JOY for her because this is going to be such an exciting, Spirit-filled, miracle-filled journey that will bring her faith to the next level. One day my turn will come.
She will preach the word to the ends of the earth, she will pick up snakes with her hands, drink poison and it will not hurt her, she will lay hands on the sick and they will be healed, in JESUS' NAME! WAAAAAAHHHHH!
Intercession Rating: 11!
Peanut Toast & Coffee at TOAST, Ngee Ann City: 8
INTERCESSION TWO: KELLY & STEVEN
The day got tougher as the hours passed. I met my business partner and pal Millie for lunch -- we ate COCA steamboat buffet at Ngee Ann City. Waaaaaaaah! Stomach circumference expanded by 10".
She drops me off at Hazel Park Condo to visit my church mates Kelly and Steven. They're newish Christians (not a year old yet). Steven used to be a temple medium's assistant but has long stopped. However, we believe there are still demonic spirits that reside in him — they call them Kwee Kia (baby ghosts) which are the spirits of dead foetuses that are worshipped and they do things like reveal 4D numbers or tell you what your neighour's mahjong tiles are.
Anyway, Steven had cancer in Oct 2004. By God's grace it went into remission after chemo. It came back when he started attending New Creation Church in January. By March he was in pretty bad shape. Up to this point he was still an non-believer. Kelly's colleague, who is from City Harvest Church, invited them to Benny Hinn's crusade on 12 March. The presence of God touched Steven and he received salvation that night (PRAISE THE LORD!).
There is a spiritual tussle for Steven now. The spirit of cancer threatens to overwhelm him. The tumours have grown across his colon at breakneck speed. He is now at 4th stage.
I was in trepidation for weeks. One of the leaders who had been ministering to Kelly and Steven asked if I could help to talk to Kelly because of my own experiences. I have a great fear which I must surrender to the Lord: I try not to lay hands and pray for people because the last time I did, the person died and I was severely traumatised and my faith took a beating.
But I knew God wanted me to move. I prayed for Kelly and Steven in my own quiet time. Visions of Steven at a supermarket stocking up his trolley with "GOOD THINGS" came to view: Restoring his health, restoring his ability to walk, restoring his colour etc. I know God wants to heal him and it will happen — we just need to unblock all pockets of doubt and unbelief or fear that are hindering a complete recovery.
I finally went to pray for Kelly and STeven yesterday. I knew it would be draining, but it was actually good! I prayed for Kelly -- I know she is the one who needs more strength because she needs to be strong for herself, her children, his parents AND for Steven. She is the one satan will want to take down because she is the pillar. satan is fighting for steven's life because he knows he has already lost his soul. If he can't have STeven, then God also can't have steven to further the kingdom of God on earth.
Well, our God is an awesome God and satan is a pathetic liar. We already know who will win this, but much perseverance must occur both on the sufferer's end as well as the intercessor's end. I must pray fervently for strongholds to be broken, for Steven to trust 100%, not walking by sight but by faith that God has already healed him. When he makes it out of this, he will be a powerful walking testimony for the Lord and will be able to attract people to Jesus.
So he is a very important man who must be protected by prayer.
After praying in tongues and rebuking the spirit of cancer, I did not SEE any change (but God doesn't work according to my timetable) but I trust that faith was imparted. I was tired. I said my goodbyes and left.
Intercession Rating: 8
INTERCESSION THREE: EP
EP is a Spirit-filled Christian. He was the one who led me to the baptism of the Holy Spirit and I want to bless him in every way.
He's going through possibly the worst period of his life. His wife who suffers from paranoid dementia has fled the country with their son, who suffers from cerebral palsy. He is going through severe depression because the family of his wife lied and tricked him and refuse to help him connect with his son, to whom he is very close.
EP is a priority for me. Yesterday after Steven and Kelly I made my way to his office with my brother. We talked business for a few hours, then we went for dinner and that's when the real conversation began.
It started with a debate on whether Christians are "once saved, always saved". (See later post) EP says Once saved, always saved. I say Work out our salvation with fear and trembling.
I had no idea till later that he was in that frame of mind where he needs to be sure of his salvation despite the fact he is entertaining the possibility of doing some terrible things.
The evening derailed into a carnal conversation about how to get his son back, the extreme measures he is willing to take, and the putrid hatred he has for his wife and her family.
This was not the reasoning of a sound mind.
This was not a man who knew the mighty grace of God, despite the fact he was propounding grace to me not 30 minutes earlier..
This was not EP as I knew him, he had been possessed by his own anger and paranoia.
This was a man devoid of the Spirit. The Holy Spirit was gone from him, I felt it like a gnawing absence.
It bugged me to no end. I had a splitting headache from the negative Spirit, the Spirit of hate he had cultivated till it was a giant looming over us. I was exhausted and drained from two previous sessions of intercessory prayer. I could not fight. I just wanted to get out of there and pray.
How did things get so bad? EP has great work to do for the Lord -- he is gifted in business to fund the church. Sure satan wants him to stop because the harder he works the more money goes to God's cause.
But satan also knew his weakness, which is denial and procrastination. He was in denial about his wife's mental state for too long a time. He procrastinated to take action, and she found the chance to run away.
Lessons for me:
1. When God speaks, OBEY IMMEDIATELY
2. God will send people, circumstances to you to reflect the Truth. Pray about it, then open your eyes and see. Don't deny there is a problem when there is one. It's not biblical to keep saying things are fine when they are not, and especially when things can be easily fixed in the natural. It is when you have done everything in your power in accordance to God's will that you leave the rest to him, and rest in Him. But He's not going to supernaturally come over here and clean up your mess for you when He already told you to do it months, maybe years ago.
I did not get to pray for EP last night because the rejection was very strong and I honestly was too tired in the Spirit and physically to do him any good.
I pray now that he quits all thoughts of satan.
I pray he seeks God's wisdom and strength in this matter.
I pray God will break his newly found drinking habit.
I pray God will give him a rhema word to seal comfort right into his heart.
I pray God will restore his family.
I pray God will make a way for his wife to get help and to transform her for His purpose.
I pray David will not come out of this traumatised but instead strengthened.
I pray EP's wife' family will get saved because of the mighty miracles that God is going to perform in her.
I pray EP will use this opportunity to rise to the next level with the Lord, to turn his Job situation into triumph and victory.
Intercession Rating: 0
Penang Buffet at Copthorne King: Tasteless
I go home and have dreams about my daughter disappearing after a bomb goes off in the building we are in. Very depressing.
I reject and rebuke the spirits that threaten to come over me.
AWAY FROM ME, IN THE MIGHTY NAME OF JESUS!
I'm very new to praying over people, being Ms Selfish and Scared New Christian. But I do know God is kicking my fat butt and saying "GO, OBEY!"
Before I embarked yesterday, I prayed very hard in the Spirit and felt Him strengthen me in the morning. In fact I was overflowing with JOY on the MRT. It's a great feeling!!! I was looking forward to meeting my pal Maire, who left for India on her very first mission trip last night.
INTERCESSION ONE: MAIRE
Maire is a bright bubbly lady who is single. She was sent by God to lead me back to Him during the worst years of my life -- my living angel! Her own walk with the Lord is a passionate, argument-filled one, and she does a lot of praying in the car while driving to work. So not surprising she has had a couple of Dings on her Mazda! : ) Maire has, as any Singaporean woman over the age of 25, her own set of idiosyncrasies, and one of them is not wanting to get out of her comfort zone (I am very familiar with this).
She initially wanted to go on this mission trip because the church leader she is assisting was going. She also likes him and I think he also likes her.
He gets very sick and has an operation (not dying kind but because he itchy backside doctor said he's not allowed to move for 3 weeks and hence cannot go India)
Maire panicks, because her name is already down for the mission trip, but she in the flesh really dowan to go without him.
She prays and tries to cut a deal with God (also very familiar territory) to say since her role is only assisting, she will go on another trip.
God sends her old pastor from her previous church to the same restaurant she is dining. He tells her "GO TO INDIA".
She calls me to tell me the saga, I feel the quickening of the Holy Spirit and tell her "GO TO INDIA"
God is going to move very mightily while she is there. She had a vision of masses of children without eyes or mouths. I believe she will go to give them eyes that will see that Jesus is Lord, and mouths that will confess it.
She bites the bullet, and signs up for India anyway.
Shortly, her leader's doctor says he can go to India also.
But the important part is that Maire decided to obey God, and fought not to be swayed by her feelings for her leader or by her own flesh which was screaming out "Healing And Deliverance?! I know NOTHING about it."
From her experience I learned a powerful lesson: sometimes God will want to pluck you our of your comfort zone COMPLETELY. I mean, rip that comfort zone like a plastic bag off you. You will feel naked and exposed and definitely powerless and wanting to run away. That's when you know God will move if you obey because you have crucified your flesh, you are nothing, He is everything. Only when there is nothing left of your own self, can God work mighty miracles.
We prayed and I was filled with a GREAT GREAT JUMPING UP JOY for her because this is going to be such an exciting, Spirit-filled, miracle-filled journey that will bring her faith to the next level. One day my turn will come.
She will preach the word to the ends of the earth, she will pick up snakes with her hands, drink poison and it will not hurt her, she will lay hands on the sick and they will be healed, in JESUS' NAME! WAAAAAAHHHHH!
Intercession Rating: 11!
Peanut Toast & Coffee at TOAST, Ngee Ann City: 8
INTERCESSION TWO: KELLY & STEVEN
The day got tougher as the hours passed. I met my business partner and pal Millie for lunch -- we ate COCA steamboat buffet at Ngee Ann City. Waaaaaaaah! Stomach circumference expanded by 10".
She drops me off at Hazel Park Condo to visit my church mates Kelly and Steven. They're newish Christians (not a year old yet). Steven used to be a temple medium's assistant but has long stopped. However, we believe there are still demonic spirits that reside in him — they call them Kwee Kia (baby ghosts) which are the spirits of dead foetuses that are worshipped and they do things like reveal 4D numbers or tell you what your neighour's mahjong tiles are.
Anyway, Steven had cancer in Oct 2004. By God's grace it went into remission after chemo. It came back when he started attending New Creation Church in January. By March he was in pretty bad shape. Up to this point he was still an non-believer. Kelly's colleague, who is from City Harvest Church, invited them to Benny Hinn's crusade on 12 March. The presence of God touched Steven and he received salvation that night (PRAISE THE LORD!).
There is a spiritual tussle for Steven now. The spirit of cancer threatens to overwhelm him. The tumours have grown across his colon at breakneck speed. He is now at 4th stage.
I was in trepidation for weeks. One of the leaders who had been ministering to Kelly and Steven asked if I could help to talk to Kelly because of my own experiences. I have a great fear which I must surrender to the Lord: I try not to lay hands and pray for people because the last time I did, the person died and I was severely traumatised and my faith took a beating.
But I knew God wanted me to move. I prayed for Kelly and Steven in my own quiet time. Visions of Steven at a supermarket stocking up his trolley with "GOOD THINGS" came to view: Restoring his health, restoring his ability to walk, restoring his colour etc. I know God wants to heal him and it will happen — we just need to unblock all pockets of doubt and unbelief or fear that are hindering a complete recovery.
I finally went to pray for Kelly and STeven yesterday. I knew it would be draining, but it was actually good! I prayed for Kelly -- I know she is the one who needs more strength because she needs to be strong for herself, her children, his parents AND for Steven. She is the one satan will want to take down because she is the pillar. satan is fighting for steven's life because he knows he has already lost his soul. If he can't have STeven, then God also can't have steven to further the kingdom of God on earth.
Well, our God is an awesome God and satan is a pathetic liar. We already know who will win this, but much perseverance must occur both on the sufferer's end as well as the intercessor's end. I must pray fervently for strongholds to be broken, for Steven to trust 100%, not walking by sight but by faith that God has already healed him. When he makes it out of this, he will be a powerful walking testimony for the Lord and will be able to attract people to Jesus.
So he is a very important man who must be protected by prayer.
After praying in tongues and rebuking the spirit of cancer, I did not SEE any change (but God doesn't work according to my timetable) but I trust that faith was imparted. I was tired. I said my goodbyes and left.
Intercession Rating: 8
INTERCESSION THREE: EP
EP is a Spirit-filled Christian. He was the one who led me to the baptism of the Holy Spirit and I want to bless him in every way.
He's going through possibly the worst period of his life. His wife who suffers from paranoid dementia has fled the country with their son, who suffers from cerebral palsy. He is going through severe depression because the family of his wife lied and tricked him and refuse to help him connect with his son, to whom he is very close.
EP is a priority for me. Yesterday after Steven and Kelly I made my way to his office with my brother. We talked business for a few hours, then we went for dinner and that's when the real conversation began.
It started with a debate on whether Christians are "once saved, always saved". (See later post) EP says Once saved, always saved. I say Work out our salvation with fear and trembling.
I had no idea till later that he was in that frame of mind where he needs to be sure of his salvation despite the fact he is entertaining the possibility of doing some terrible things.
The evening derailed into a carnal conversation about how to get his son back, the extreme measures he is willing to take, and the putrid hatred he has for his wife and her family.
This was not the reasoning of a sound mind.
This was not a man who knew the mighty grace of God, despite the fact he was propounding grace to me not 30 minutes earlier..
This was not EP as I knew him, he had been possessed by his own anger and paranoia.
This was a man devoid of the Spirit. The Holy Spirit was gone from him, I felt it like a gnawing absence.
It bugged me to no end. I had a splitting headache from the negative Spirit, the Spirit of hate he had cultivated till it was a giant looming over us. I was exhausted and drained from two previous sessions of intercessory prayer. I could not fight. I just wanted to get out of there and pray.
How did things get so bad? EP has great work to do for the Lord -- he is gifted in business to fund the church. Sure satan wants him to stop because the harder he works the more money goes to God's cause.
But satan also knew his weakness, which is denial and procrastination. He was in denial about his wife's mental state for too long a time. He procrastinated to take action, and she found the chance to run away.
Lessons for me:
1. When God speaks, OBEY IMMEDIATELY
2. God will send people, circumstances to you to reflect the Truth. Pray about it, then open your eyes and see. Don't deny there is a problem when there is one. It's not biblical to keep saying things are fine when they are not, and especially when things can be easily fixed in the natural. It is when you have done everything in your power in accordance to God's will that you leave the rest to him, and rest in Him. But He's not going to supernaturally come over here and clean up your mess for you when He already told you to do it months, maybe years ago.
I did not get to pray for EP last night because the rejection was very strong and I honestly was too tired in the Spirit and physically to do him any good.
I pray now that he quits all thoughts of satan.
I pray he seeks God's wisdom and strength in this matter.
I pray God will break his newly found drinking habit.
I pray God will give him a rhema word to seal comfort right into his heart.
I pray God will restore his family.
I pray God will make a way for his wife to get help and to transform her for His purpose.
I pray David will not come out of this traumatised but instead strengthened.
I pray EP's wife' family will get saved because of the mighty miracles that God is going to perform in her.
I pray EP will use this opportunity to rise to the next level with the Lord, to turn his Job situation into triumph and victory.
Intercession Rating: 0
Penang Buffet at Copthorne King: Tasteless
I go home and have dreams about my daughter disappearing after a bomb goes off in the building we are in. Very depressing.
I reject and rebuke the spirits that threaten to come over me.
AWAY FROM ME, IN THE MIGHTY NAME OF JESUS!
posted by Threez at 6:30 PM
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